Welcome to our monthly installment of the Insecure Writer's Support Group!
Pretty much if you know a writer, chances are they are insecure about it at some point. Some of more us than others ;). Once a month we gather online and share our fears, hopes, and dreams. Join us and find more awesome blogs to read! http://www.insecurewriterssupportgroup.com/
First off, a cheer to all the other writers out there- to the ones who have hit the NYT list and get multi-million dollar contracts to those settling into a nice list run, to us just launching books into the wild, and those still working towards that first sale, or even first book.
It's not easy to do what any of us do, and most non-writers have no clue. So I am raising a pint of Smithwicks to all of us- KEEP IT UP!! What you are doing matters, and it is feeding your soul. Nuff said.
Now, on to my blog for today.
As a struggling writer, my one target was to get my book out there. Published. In the hands of total strangers.
Now, granted, I have a number of books, so which one would make it first wasn't clear, but I wanted at least ONE of my worlds and characters out there.
Trad publishing wasn't working for me at the time, so I went Indie. What a long, strange trip it's been! But the book is out there. More books will be out there. I have become the swag whore of Babylon. I have found that I can NOT look at Amazon or I will loose my mind. I have had my first big book signing.
Now what?
I'm not saying that to be flip, I know the "now what" is to keep writing my books. And I love doing that. Even when I'm stuck and its messy and hopeless and I want to curl up in a ball and sob for a few days. I love writing and editing.
But I thought that having a book out would change me more. It was such a goal, such a "but if I can just do THIS...", that I really thought things would change in my head.
Nope.
Nada.
Zip.
I sort of feel like I'm at this end of this stone pier when I figured I would be a lot further down.
The realization that it is the journey, not our destination (trite, but true apparently) is what is hitting me now. I was so focused on each goal along the way, each step that had to be completed, that I forgot that completing those steps was important too.
Yes, I'm at "this" end of that long stone walkway, but the view here isn't too bad. Maybe I'll get to that distant end, maybe I won't. But I need to enjoy the journey.
That's the "now what".
Ah, I remember that feeling. Perhaps we all think life will change once we've finally published our first book. Maybe mine did, but not in the way I thought. Suddenly everything became scarier. I mean, people were reading my book!
ReplyDeleteWhat if they expected another book? What if I couldn't write another one good enough to release to the world?
Yeah, it was crippling. I stopped writing. Then I had to come to the same place you are now. What if I just wrote because it made me happy? Forget what people thought or said about the story. Write simply because I wanted to. And if there was something worth sharing? Bonus!
Good luck with everything!
Thank you, Charity! It's great to know I'm not the only one ;). Good luck to you as well!
DeleteI am so with you on this! Just yesterday I vented to my husband about a book thing that's stressing me out (I'm in the midst of signing my first contract). He responded, lovingly, Enjoy the journey, dummy. LOL
ReplyDeleteEach step is a milestone. It's SO hard to remember this when we are focused intently on that end goal. So I guess your Now What is Right Now. Ooh I might have to use that in something :)
Here's my IWSG post
I love that, Stephsco! Your now what is right now...that is sort of brilliant! And your husband is a very bright man :).
DeleteIt's always a process, never a finish in sight! Whether first book or 51st! The journey is still bumpy, the nerves are still raw, the insecurity is the same but the thrill never goes away. Carry on!!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Nancy! I think once I start enjoying the thrill, this will be easier ;).
DeleteWhen people ask how being published changed my life I say, "When I discovered my first book on Amazon I called my family members over and showed them the pretty Amazon page. Then I got up and served dinner." Yep, not so sexy is it? BUT, there was this time I walked into a classroom and heard one of the kids whisper to another, "It's thee author!" All reverent tones. There are some really awesome moments too. But mostly it is just continuing on with life, just like when I was a Customer Support Manager. So, yes, enjoy the journey, but also live your life outside your writing world. They truly compliment each other. (Just like when I was a Customer Support Manager!)
ReplyDeleteLOL!!! that's great, Kai :). I will say my day job reminds me why I write ;).
DeleteOh yeah. I'm just chuckling because I blogged almost the exact same thing about 6 months after my first book released. The journey never ends.
ReplyDeleteThat's too funny, Crystal! Good to know this is a well-trod path I'm on ;).
DeleteYes, enjoy the journey. Like Kai says, it's not sexy. Maybe if we get to best selling status there's more glamour.
ReplyDeleteVery true, M- maybe at some point it gets sexier? LOL- doubtful, but many of us do most of our work in jammies or sweats so we can't expect a lot ;).
DeleteYour post read like the inhale before you take your next step onto your new journey. Actually, I had a great visual of a closing scene of a movie (not that that's helpful to you).
ReplyDeleteBest of luck as you continue your journey or start your next mini one. And remember, you have achieved completion on one part, so that is something to revel in. :)
I like that, Loni :). "Annnndddd ONWARD!" (That's the exhale after the inhale ;)). Best of luck to you as well!
DeleteAnd remember that we're all on our own journey at our own pace! That pier will be traversed, it just will have to happen in YOUR own time. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, electicali! :) That own pace has been an issue for me too- so hard to want to see what everyone else is doing!
DeleteThe journey is the thing. I'll gladly share the path with you and everyone else that cares to this way. :-)
ReplyDeleteHere's my link if you'd like to drop by :-)
Anna from Elements of Writing
Thanks, Anna :) it's nice to have friendly folks along the path!
DeleteThere are plenty more journey's out there to enjoy. Start another one :)
ReplyDeleteThanks dolorah! Onward we go!
DeleteI looked at your Glass Gargoyle cover and thought I'd probably enjoy it. For now, my journey is all editing other people's books because writing my own hasn't been well tolerated by hubby from about my 5th unpublished year onward. Since journeys can change directions without warning, be glad you're not thrown off that pier and into the ocean. I'm rarely sad because I'm glad I found an indie author-ship nearby that pays me for fixing its problems. And the money keeps hubby from complaining about my reading and book blog. Still, I want to write, so I'm doing some short stories this year.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Sheri. I really love the work my cover artist did :). I hadn't thought about being thrown off that pier, but you are right, destinations can change! If your heart is still with your writing, I do hope you get back to it/continue :).
DeleteIt's definitely a marathon, not a sprint.... *HUGS* You're doing awesome, one foot in front of the other... :)
ReplyDeleteLisa
I keep saying that to myself, Lisa! LOL! maybe I need it tattooed on my arm ;). Hugs back at you and thanks!
DeleteAs a person who lives vicariously through your writing adventure I'm glad you're stopping to smell the roses (so to speak) and enjoying your accomplishments. You very much deserve to. However, as your beta reader, I'm like quit the rubbernecking and go back to work, girl, the pier ain't getting any shorter. Multi-task! Enjoy and work.
ReplyDeleteSharon
LOL!!! Thanks, Sharon :)
DeleteIt's changed, but not necessarily easier. You find that the next mountain is just beyond the current peak. Enjoy the journey, indeed.
ReplyDeletePlay off the Page
Thank you, Mary :)
DeleteHi, Marie,
ReplyDeleteYes, it is all about the journey. WE ALL have many roads to conquer. But that's what makes it fun, too. Think about what may be at the end of the next rainbow...will it be a pot of gold or another rainbow?
Dropped in to say, HI, from Alex's list... Nice to meet you!
Nice to meet you too, Michael. There's always a chance for that pot of gold :).
DeleteLove your attitude! We're all somewhere along that path. While it's become almost cliche, yes it is the journey that counts. Enjoy.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Diane :). It's nice to know we're all heading the same way, and that the people ahead of me haven't fallen off the pier!
DeleteSuch a great post. It's definitely about the journey. With every book and every marketing lesson learned, I grow. I write because I love it, but I still hope someday that I hit on the right thing. Until then, I'll enjoy the ride.
ReplyDeleteMy IWSG Post
Thank you, Tia! It's almost like each step is a rung, and once we've got that one done we're on to the next one!
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